life is to be celebrated. we are each other's keepers. we are the guardian of humanity. we are who we are. we are you and me. and when you think that you are now old and wiser. think again. you might still afraid of the dark.
Friday, December 23, 2016
those dimmed light
i just go by my instinct
he asked me to put on my career cap
i wish i had
he said he will support me to the top
but mere words are not enough
my plates are full
my minds are empty
Sunday, December 11, 2016
Friday, December 2, 2016
used to
i used to be a lot of things.
used to.
Thursday, November 24, 2016
ask me anything, but..
on how my money disappear
on how much i ate yesterday
on how i cannot raise my kids like yours.
walk the talk
senget.
Ya Tuhan, kau jadikanlah aku pemimpin yang baik ke atas mereka-mereka yang di atas bahuku. 💬💂
Tuesday, November 22, 2016
dipinjamkan
Dugaan paling hebat adalah tatkala doamu tersambut oleh Tuhanmu.
Redha kah kau?
Masih bersangka baik?
Qada' dan Qadar?
Semua manusia mahu bahagia. Tapi bahagia dunia, hanyalah sementara. Ganjaran yang sebenarnya adalah nun di sana... akhirat nanti di syurga. Bukan di dunia. Segala amalan di sini adalah cerminan hidup di sana.
Monday, November 21, 2016
socially awkward
often, i'll end up physically and emotionally drained and tired
and i will need a lottttttttttt of alone time to heal and recuperate.
it's not that i hate people,
i just don't know how to deal with other people.
a classic introverts.
Thursday, November 10, 2016
Nikmat
Friday, October 28, 2016
simple maths
i replied that i dont do much makeup on my face
you asked me how i manage to cook everyday in the morning before going to work
i replied that sometimes i do have my lazy days and i just drop in McDonalds for food
so, if i am lazy every single day
i do have to feed my family junk food every days
which is why i choose to cook most of the time
Wednesday, October 26, 2016
penumpang
adatlah.. kalau dah menumpang.
pejam mata, tutup telinga.
kalau tak, kau yang depresi.
p/s: i just want a place on my own. a place i can call MY HOME.
Wednesday, October 19, 2016
Friday, October 14, 2016
you are who you are
but i think, through the time, people change. all people change.
for better or worse.
we all change.
Wednesday, October 12, 2016
those days ahead
Wednesday, October 5, 2016
things to remember
Friday, September 30, 2016
self abused
This movie describe it best...
p/s: i want to write further.. but have things to do. sorry!~
Wednesday, September 21, 2016
running with chores every morning
i still love you..
like a human-and-air relationship.
husband, why you are so selamba when it comes to torture me every morning!
grrrrr!!!!
Thursday, September 15, 2016
when things getting quieter..
Friday, September 9, 2016
6.9.2013
you keep on telling yourself, that you won't lose me
like a mantra
and i steadily convince myself
i am forever the same
.
..
...
look at where we are now
staring on each other
missing one another
only from distance
cause both of us have an everest of ego
but no one have the guts to climb it
yet.
Sunday, September 4, 2016
Monday, August 22, 2016
kualiti vs kuantiti
lama peram sampai jadi nanah kat hati.
mulalah keluar benda-benda merepek.
satu aje...
kalau kau tak penting, aku takkan terasa macam ni sekali.
dan bila lihat dalam cermin,
kalau aku tak penting, kau takkan terasa macam tu sekali.
...
brain failure
akan tiba satu tahap dalam hidupmu, yang "even age doesn't justify your brain". even at my 30's, i still have problems with my bestie. sorry my sayangs, i, myself is looking forward to past this phase and become the usual mother i am to both of you.
love you all.
Wednesday, August 17, 2016
when lips are sealed but never sold
Monday, August 8, 2016
Post scklm
Well, after discharging negative ions that circulates in my body this past few days, I choose to love over hatred. Time to let go and be free.
True, if you speak about it openly i might not be this shocked. The fact that you are the person I go to for whatever reason.. it makes me really small in my tiny little world. I don't realize that you actually hate to hear me rambles on my life. I am so sorry, from the bottom of my heart.
I'm not sure about taking off your future from you, because I see you a lot stronger these days and I am very proud of all your accomplishment even though our feelings might not mutual.
I still love you and appreciate that you have been there trough my toughest time. But I will let you go cause I want every good things in your life..even it mean to zipped my mouth for eternity.
I wish you all the best, you are the closest friend that I have and the only person that I can speak my mind. So sorry you hate me for it.
Lesson learned.
Friday, August 5, 2016
m'emo'
i take what is mine, i left which wasn't belong to me
thank you
for your honesty
But if it wasn't me
it's ok
i am still taking it
life is colourful, right?
cause black and white is too dull.
and forgiveness
is the way to break yourself free.
Wednesday, August 3, 2016
between "if" and "why"
between "if" and "why"... we often left hanging. the possibilities are endless. too many question are unanswered.
maybe those answer are never meant to be found. our visibility is limited.
we only have choices to make.
don't ask too much.
expect less. celebrate your being rather than curse for what you have been missing.
life is too short. be thankful.
**4 days to SCKLM... only time would tell. i have nothing to prove. i am just trying to enjoy the whole 'me' time finally.
Monday, July 25, 2016
Makan
Note to self.
Kalau marah...makan
Kalau sedih...makan
Kalau risau...makan
Kalau hepi...kemas rumah
Friday, July 22, 2016
Dream again
I usually just skip all this advertisement in youtube. But somehow got stumble upon and stuck on this one advertisement by SKII.
~Maybe as what i am now, a mother, i have left my dreams as a child unattended. But, i refuse to let it go. I WILL TRAVEL THE WORLD. This is my promise to myself, now, then, forever.
:)
Thursday, July 21, 2016
abnormal
Ke diaorang ni tak normal?
#carialasantaksempatworkoutdah2hari
#scklmisarountthecorner
#dielooooooorhh
Wednesday, July 20, 2016
lost
It's just i often find myself lost in a crowd
People seems to speak in a language that i cannot comprehend
Quite often i draw myself away
...far away that i lost my way back
Hold me, love
Don't let me go
I may be in distance
But i never meant to be further from you
I just so wrapped up in my own bubble
...and the world became so alien to me
Tuesday, July 19, 2016
bila terantuk baru nak tengadah
jangan putus doa kat Tuhan... moga dipermudahkan apa yang susah.
mesti khilaf tu datangnya daripada diri kita sendiri.
Monday, July 18, 2016
Journey to sanity #1
What have i done to myself😣😣😣...
Gonna be fasting today.. this is workout before sahur. Pray I'll be standing strong today. Pray I'll last until dawn for berbuka.
Thursday, July 14, 2016
bila mana Dia sebenarnya sayang kita
orang yang berdosa tidaklah sampai jatuh kepada taraf kafir.. kerana pintu taubat sentiasa terbuka..insyaAllah.
.
.
:)
Tuesday, July 12, 2016
Sikit-sikit lama-lama jadi bukit
Betul jugak.. mana nak dapat kalau kita tak mintak kan (?)
Wednesday, July 6, 2016
Of parenthood
For me, having a child is like having the best MLM scheme ever. With proper guidance and teachings, they will be your ultimate investment dunya and akhirah.
Wednesday, June 15, 2016
Meeting needs (mengepam susu di bulan puasa)
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hasil tuaian hari ni.. susu still pekat.. alhamdulillah |
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susu kambing perisa coklat kegemaran saya |
Tuesday, June 14, 2016
Legal fratenity
Aku 20-5-2011
Dia patah berbicara
Aku pendengar yang setia
Dia punya nama di pintu
Aku hanya nama di atas kertas
Mendengarnya, buat aku terkasima
Mendengarnya, buat aku mahu menjadi dia
Kali pertama berperasaan begini
*senyum*
Rupanya, rasa mahu itu masih ada
if this is how older and wiser sounds like
i couldn't wait.
Syurga nan jauh
Cerita cinta kita.. tidaklah sehebat laila dan majnun.
Cerita cinta kita.. bermula selepas aku terima nikahnya.
Cerita cinta kita.. berpaksikan atas rasa redha.
Kau redha akan aku. Aku redha akan kamu.
Warna warni..yang hanya jelas di mata kita.
Semoga Tuhan kurniakan syurga terindah buatmu, sang suami.
semoga Tuhan kasihankan aku, dan letakkan aku disebelahmu.
Monday, May 23, 2016
change
but you cant change your story
you can change your future
but your past remain
you can change your dress
but you cant change the size
you can change the ring
but the hand is still the same
Tuesday, May 17, 2016
working on progress
i say.. it won't.
because, it really won't.
there.. i said it twice.
love equals to hardwork. no short cut. you have to spend your time, efford, energy.
just like the end-year bonus, say you really working hard, still there is no guarantee that you will get it.
but, eventually you will earn a good deal out of it..somehow or rather in whatever forms or manner.. if you really do it sincerely. InsyaAllah.
Sunday, May 8, 2016
Cupcake mission
Thursday, May 5, 2016
Braveheart
Here's the news, i've registered myself for SCKL Half Marathon this coming August.
The thing is, i actually shouldn't do any heavy exercise in six months due to my c-sec last February. Is running a marathon considered as heavy exercise? i'm not so sure my self. i didn't even do light jogging anymore. But i'm being positive about it.
But running alone??? What am i thinking????
#$&^^(*)(&&^$$@#^(__(%$!!!
Tuesday, April 26, 2016
Count your blessing
So, have no worries. The elders have survived this life...so do we.
Lets celebrate us being human. Stop worrying.
Monday, April 4, 2016
Bila kau tahu tanpa aku bagitahu
#sebabakutakdapatmasukhutankaujadimangsa
#ineedtoworkouttodestress
#pantangpunyahal
Tuesday, March 29, 2016
Solo molo
Yang seorang wanita yang sudah berkeluarga juga punya rasa untuk bersahabat
Lagi-lagi bila majoriti temannya daripada golongan yang masih solo
Tak layakkah wanita berkeluarga punya sahabat lagi?
#not complaining just a pound to ponder
Monday, March 28, 2016
Bila yang muda tetap akan tua
Mungkin takkan pernah jadi anak yang baik seumur hidup ini
Jadi aku tak tahu macam mana mahu jadi anak yang baik
Tapi.. aku sentiasa belajar dan cuba menjadi sebaik yang aku mungkin
Dalam hati-hati, terkadang aku tetap kecilkan hati orang tuaku tanpa sedar
Bila rasa salah menyelubungi, mahu saja aku putarkan masa
Tapi masa sentiasa dan terus maju ke depan
Maka jadilah aku dikalangan orang-orang yang rugi
Kerugian kasih sayang orang tuanya
Kuranglah keberkatan hidup aku di masa itu
Aku tak sempurna
Orang tua kita juga tak sempurna
Semoga Tuhan melindungi kita dan orang tua kita.
Perkara rawak di tengah malam #2
Aku belajar tentang diri sendiri melalui mereka-mereka ini.
Sungguhpun ini semua hanyalah pinjaman daripadamu Tuhan
Terima kasih
Terima kasih
Terima kasih
Untuk segala yang manis
Untuk segala yang pahit
Untuk segala yang masam
Untuk segala yang masin
Saat ini, menulis tatkala semua dah tidur sangat indah
Setiap raut suami dan anak-anak menjadi penguat dan pengubat hati
Mungkin perasaan inilah yang paling dibenci syaitan
Perasaan bersyukur.
Perkara rawak di tengah malam
Kadang-kadang kita tak sedar
Kadang-kadang kita lupa
Kadang-kadang kita in denial
Kadang-kadang kita usaha cari alasan
Pokok pangkalnya diri sendiri...
Kalau aku lupa, pohon ingatkan ya.
Monday, March 21, 2016
Hero
Please teach me to be a good and sound mother to you. I pray every day that you will turn out and grow up to be the best man anyone could have you as her imam. I do hope i can raise you the best possible manner so that you will inherit the best part of me and your father and you'll forever protect our small family.
I will love you, for better or worse.
Grow up my hero..
14 tahun dulu
ilham-ilham terbit..
Sesetengah kata...aku cliche.. konon nak relate life experience dgn movie
but i dont see it that way
Some movies really save thinking style
some movies saves my life
some movies became my escape from reality
some movies moves me
Kadang-kadang wayang di kaca tv lebih menarik daripada wayang realiti
.....
.....
14 years for a comeback.
i'll be waiting for Rangga to grow up and face his reality for so long
of course..... thanks for reminding me.
Monday, March 7, 2016
Mengaji
Isteri : Abang cuba periksa, ibu ada tak kat atas. Entah dah bangun ke belum. Dah nak dekat pukul 7pagi ni.
Suami : Ok. (Naik tangga)
Suami : Ibu takda kat atas.
Isteri : ok.. ayang kejut ibu.
Isteri : Sebenarnya, pagi tadi dlm pukul 4 ayang terjaga...
Suami : ....
Isteri : Masa nak susukan si kecik, ayang dengar suara perempuan mengaji. Ingat ibu.
Suami : tak, ibu cakap takda dia bangun pagi tadi.
Suami : haaa..... suara siapa tu....
Isteri : Hmm.. ok lah dia ngaji.. jangan mengilai sudah.
-.-
Saturday, March 5, 2016
A dream
Aku punya impian. Untuk miliki keluarga impian... at least 4-5 orang anak.. meriahnya keluarga. Byknya pahala boleh aku kumpul. Mahu lahirkan ramai bakal-bakal imam..tak kurang juga puteri-puteri yang menyenangkan hati ibu dan ayahnya..
Namun, mungkin tiada rezeki.
#welcome to the world Aqil Aiman bin Khairul Najib. Now, u've completed our fantastic4.😚
Thursday, February 18, 2016
Hidup vs weight loss journey
hidup ni ibarat weight loss journey
mula-mula kau bajet dengan telan ubat kurus segala tu, kau akan segera kurus dan gojes macam Taylor Swift..
hakikatnya, tak sampai habis pun satu botol ubat tu kau telan kau give up
konon ubat tu takde kesan.. padahal ko tak fikir ko melantak macam harimau kebuluran tetiap hari..
which of course defeat the purpose to get slim and slender even ko dah telan 14botol ubat sekalipun..
kemudian kau tengok semuaorang masuk gym
ko pun turut subscribe membership..
sudahnya bila dah expired, kau salahkan pulak harga yang mahal dan konon-konon kena tipu untuk masuk membership
padahal, kau sendiri tahu yang kau bayar lepas dipujuk abang sado dan kakak taff.. terpukau dek kekemasan badan diorang.
tapi, kau sendiri lagi prefer goyang kaki kat sofa, sambil tengok movie dan makan popcorn
daripada bebusuk-busuk dan berpeluh-peluh di gym
sesekali pergi gym pun hanya untuk cuci mata
Sampai sini je.. aku dah xde mood nak buat penutup..
Sebab aku rasa orang tau apa aku nak sampaikan..
Manusia ni cepat sangat mengalah. Tak semua. Tapi ramai jugaklah..
Semoga kita sentiasa bermuhasabah dgn setiap tindak tanduk kita ye.
Tuesday, February 2, 2016
rebel at its purest form
i am not such a follower. i am a person who do things my own way. and if you want to teach me how to do my things, i will definitely be a rebel.
so people, i may not be born to pleased you. you give me mission, i will try to complete it in my own way.
if i fall or stumble along the road, it is my lesson. with all the lesson and experience, i am hoping to be the best of me.
i don't need to have another master in my mind, as it is already crowded in there.
so, please bear with me. the great wall of China doesn't built in one day. give me chance to create my own story.
Wednesday, January 20, 2016
Anak
seribu satu nikmat..seribu satu hikmat.
Jika kau tahu betapa besarnya jasamu kepada orang tuamu..
Betapa kau yang sebenarnya guru kami..
Betapa kau yang sebenarnya membesarkan kami..
Terima kasih.
Monday, January 4, 2016
10 aims for 2016
- to save RMX amount in my tabung cap ayam;
- to buy tix to either Japan, China or New Zealand for 2017 family geataway;
- to go to Perlis during mango season;
- to read 3 leadership books;
- to read 12 other than leadership books;
- to run in half-marathon;
- to run 150km over a year;
- to learn how to bake;
- to learn at least 2 types of solat sunat;
- to eat healthy, exercise, get fit and aim for under 50kg's.
*at first, i was hesitated to list down these 10 things, but then aims are much more clear when we write it down and see it. the list is not in priority sequence, all are equally important to me.
*looking forward for a better year ahead!
An answered prayers
Good morning, husband All those morning feels incomplete If you weren't by my side I'm watching you sleep, stroking your eyebrows an...